Carol Burnett - Quotes

There are 47 quotes by Carol Burnett at 95quotes.com. Find your favorite quotations and top quotes by Carol Burnett from this hand-picked collection about love, life, time. Feel free to share these quotes and sayings on Facebook, Pinterest, Tumblr & Twitter or any of your favorite social networking sites.

We don't stop going to school when we graduate.

We don't stop going to school when we graduate.

When you have a dream, you've got to grab it and never let go.

When you have a dream, you've got to grab it and never let go.

Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me. ---->>>

Words, once they are printed, have a life of their own.

Words, once they are printed, have a life of their own.

Everybody I know who is funny, it's in them. You can teach timing, or some people are able to tell a joke, though I don't like to tell jokes. But I think you have to be born with a sense of humor and a sense of timing.

Everybody I know who is funny, it's in them. You can teach timing, or some people are able to tell a joke, though I don't like to tell jokes. But I think you have to be born with a sense of humor and a sense of timing.

Adolescence is just one big walking pimple.

Adolescence is just one big walking pimple.

I wish my mother had left me something about how she felt growing up. I wish my grandmother had done the same. I wanted my girls to know me.

I wish my mother had left me something about how she felt growing up. I wish my grandmother had done the same. I wanted my girls to know me.

Because nobody goes through life without a scar.

Because nobody goes through life without a scar.

But I don't begrudge anybody, because I know how hard it is to have that dream and to make it happen, whether or not it's just to put a roof over your head and food on the table. ---->>>

I'm glad I was born when I was. My time was the golden age of variety. If I were starting out again now, maybe things would happen for me, but it certainly would not be on a variety show with 28 musicians, 12 dancers, two major guest stars, 50 costumes a week by Bob Mackie. The networks just wouldn't spend the money today. ---->>>

I love the writing. I love the idea of typing and seeing it on the computer and printing it out myself and, you know, moving sentences around. I like that. ---->>>

It's also selfish because it makes you feel good when you help others. I've been helped by acts of kindness from strangers. That's why we're here, after all, to help others. ---->>>

Comedy is tragedy - plus time. ---->>>

I don't have false teeth. Do you think I'd buy teeth like these? ---->>>

You have to go through the falling down in order to learn to walk. It helps to know that you can survive it. That's an education in itself. ---->>>

I think the hardest thing to do in the world, show-business-wise, is write comedy. ---->>>

As far as sitcoms go, I thought Jenna Elfman in 'Dharma and Greg' was a wonderful physical comedienne who had great timing. ---->>>

I'm really not that funny in real life! But I am the best audience one could find. I love to laugh. ---->>>

Celebrity was a long time in coming; it will go away. Everything goes away.

Celebrity was a long time in coming; it will go away. Everything goes away.

I do the 'New York Times' crossword puzzle every morning to keep the old grey matter ticking. ---->>>

I was kind of shy as a kid. I was a pretty good student. I was a wallflower, or nerd, if you will. ---->>>

It costs a lot to sue a magazine, and it's too bad that we don't have a system where the losing team has to pay the winning team's lawyers.

It costs a lot to sue a magazine, and it's too bad that we don't have a system where the losing team has to pay the winning team's lawyers.

I was once asked to do my Tarzan yell at Bergdorf Goodman, and a guard burst in with a gun! Now I only do it under controlled circumstances. ---->>>

I'm not always optimistic. You wouldn't have all cylinders cooking if you were always like Mary Poppins. ---->>>

My grandmother and I saw an average of eight movies a week, double features, second run. ---->>>

In '57, I got a job at the Blue Angel nightclub, and a gentleman named Ken Welch wrote all my material for me. I lived at a place called the Rehearsal Club that was actually the basis for a play called Stage Door. ---->>>

My childhood was rough, we were poor and my parents were alcoholics, but nobody was mean. I knew I was loved. We were on welfare, but I never felt abandoned or unloved. ---->>>

I very much enjoyed doing 'Law & Order,' playing a killer - that was fun, and they had a family feel around the set, so it was a happy show to do even though the subject matter was quite the opposite. ---->>>

On the good days, my mother would haul out the ukulele and we'd sit around the kitchen table - it was a cardboard table with a linoleum top - and sing. ---->>>

I had a good loud voice and I wasn't afraid to be goofy or zany. ---->>>

Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head. ---->>>

I never regretted turning down anything, I never regretted losing a job because I always felt something else was out there. ---->>>

My interesting diet tips are eat early and don't nosh between meals. I mean, I can pack it away. ---->>>

It's almost impossible to be funnier than the people in Washington. ---->>>

Well, I don't know how astute I am, but I did want to be a journalist when I was growing up. ---->>>

I liked myself better when I wasn't me. ---->>>

But I didn't ask to have somebody nose around in my private life. I didn't even ask to be famous. All I asked was to be able to earn a living making people laugh. ---->>>

My grandmother and I followed my mother here, to a house a block north of Hollywood Boulevard but a million miles away from Hollywood, if you know what I mean. We would hang out behind the ropes and look at the movie stars arriving at the premieres. ---->>>

I had it in my contract with CBS, a very weird clause that was never written before and certainly not since, that if I wanted to do a variety show within the first five years of the contract, CBS would have to put it on for 30 shows. ---->>>

My favorite is doing the television show, as a variety show, every week. If the show wasn't that great one week, we could always come back and apologize, you know? ---->>>

My grandmother and I would go see movies, and we'd come back to the apartment - we had a one-room apartment in Hollywood - and I would kind of lock myself in this little dressing room area with a cracked mirror on the door and act out what I had just seen.

My grandmother and I would go see movies, and we'd come back to the apartment - we had a one-room apartment in Hollywood - and I would kind of lock myself in this little dressing room area with a cracked mirror on the door and act out what I had just seen.

You know, one wonderful thing that came out of my Enquirer experience is that, in my case, it was ruled tabloids are magazines. Which means they didn't have the protection that a newspaper has. ---->>>

Originally, I came from Texas, and we lived on - I guess you'd call it welfare, what we called relief. ---->>>

I can't tell a joke to save my soul. It's just not my thing, though I love to listen to jokes. ---->>>

I don't eat much meat, fish, or poultry. ---->>>

I have a great memory. ---->>>

I wanted to be on Broadway, but in musical comedy. ---->>>

Biography

Nationality: American
Born: 04-26, 1933
Birthplace: in San Antonio, Texas, The United States
Die:
Occupation: Actress
Website:

Carol Creighton Burnett (born April 26, 1933) is an American actress, comedienne, singer and writer, whose career spans six decades of television. She is best known for her long-running TV variety show, The Carol Burnett Show, originally aired on CBS. She has achieved success on stage, television and film in varying genres including dramatic and comedy roles (wikipedia)